The Nechoma Greisman Anthology

Section 9: NECHOMA AS OTHERS SAW HER An outstretched hand in the fog of confusion

One Day

I really don't know where to start. I can't believe I'm actually writing about her. It feels as though she's still very much with us. And the truth is, she is with us. She is watching us now, looking down on her family, and waiting for the time when she will be reunited with all of us once again!

Last year, 5751, a Year of Miracles, I was privileged to meet Mrs. Greisman. Being that my friend had lived in her home, I had visited there quite a bit. My first impression of her is difficult to describe. I walked into her always immaculately kept house. I came to the conclusion that she must have two or three children, plus a cleaning lady! Boy was I shocked when my friend made me aware of the fact, a few days later, that she had nine children.

The more I went to her home, the more one particular thing became very clear to me. TIME IS PRECIOUS! Just watching Nechoma made you realize this. "Come, walk with me to the kitchen" was a common phrase you heard very often. Every second was calculated so carefully by her. Yet at the same time it didn't intimidate a person or make you feel guilty for not being on her level. On the contrary, she would always praise a person and encourage them further.

Once, at her home, she asked me whether I'd be able to learn with a certain woman once a week. "I really never taught someone older than me before!" was my reply. To which she immediately responded, "Dvorah, it will never hurt to try! This could be your mivtza for this year." I decided to accept it. And, before I knew it she was handing me the phone with the woman on the other end, waiting for me to set a time when she could meet with me.

Everything was action. Hama'aseh hu ha-ikar aren't only words Nechamie taught me in Pirkei Avos. She was the epitome of these words. After Shavuos I started attending her shiurim, which she gave every Shabbos afternoon. I just LOVED them. I literally looked forward to Shabboses just for her shiurim. I remember one shiur in particular. We were discussing tefilos for women. Of course, as usual, the other six ladies and I waited silently to hear what Nechomie did in regard to tefilos. And, we were all taken totally by surprise when she answered. "I daven three tefilos a day. Ever since the Rebbe Shlita mentioned women should also be careful to say 100 brochos every day, I have been davening three times a day. If I didn't daven three times a day, how would I ever say 100 brochos every day? And what's so amazing is that ever since I took on these tefilos, they seem to fit in so well with my time. How, I really don't know!!" Those words never left me. To this day, whenever I consider taking on something additional, or whenever I complain, "There isn't enough time for...," I stop and think of Nechomie Greisman.

"If there's a will, there is definitely a way!" was her motto. And her will was... whatever Hashem wanted. She was my role model in everything. I'd try to watch her sometimes, even (or should I say especially) in mundane activities. Everything was made for a purpose, for a G-dly purpose. And therefore, even washing up the dishes by her was a sacred task.

I asked her a halachic question once. It had to do with a matter of tznius. I remember that it had to do with wearing a certain kind of socks. I remember distinctly nearly every word of the answer she gave me. After thinking a few seconds she said, "Dvorah, according to halacha I'm not sure. It could be permitted. But even if it is, it never hurts to go beyond what the law requires, lifnim mishurat hadin. After all, let's remember who we are -- Princesses -- Daughters of Hashem!!" I walked home that night from her house in Yerushalayim with a feeling of awe. I can't believe it! I never realized how very special she really was, until it hit me suddenly, like a wave. I guess that her modesty was another of her many ma'alos. She acted as if she was just a "regular person." But she couldn't fool us. We all saw what a jewel she was. One day, I'll be a fraction of what she was. And let us all daven for Mashiach NOW, so that we'll all be reunited with her very soon. Thanks Nechoma for everything.